alrighty then

[bcoop]

You're a waste of God's RAM.

[bcoop]

JLuv's Only the Lonely thread from Canada was pure gold. Best poems EVAR.

If I wasn't banned over there, I'd take the time to search and cross post it all here.

[Mike]

If I wasn't banned over there, I'd take the time to search and cross post it all here.

PM sent

[mustangguy289]

I nominate the brittyann thread

That reminds me... I need to go Fap.

[Mike]

Jluv

..

Let me state that I do not have a singles ad posted anywhere, but I do have a public profile on MSN. I got this email this morning: Do guys actually think shit like this works?!?!?

how are you.i am Mr. Farooq from Pakistan, i see your profile
that i find very good and charming, so i decided to write this
mail.this is my first email to you .So i introduce my self to
you.My name is Mr.Farooq Ahmad, i have completing my
MBA ( Master in Bussines ) recently. now i am working as
Sales Manager in a Unilver .i am 28 year old.
if you like to contat me you email on these address never
use address of megafriend.com address,because when you use
this address you eamil is wasted,because now i am not
using this address, you must mail me on this address
(1) fwiu@yahoo.com
(2) fwiu@hotmail.com
i am waiting for you mail, ( Remember you must mail only
uper two address )
your new fried
Farooq Ahmad

Ummmm???? No thanx!!!

Farooq is big pimpin'!

You should toy with him. Send him a reply like this:

Farooq,

I am having very much joy that you have send me e-mail. I am always have wanted to be meet someone from Pakistan. Also my favorite persons that I am dating are have business degrees. To meet you will be very fine if you have sending money to me very lots of it. Please when you send money to make sure you are send it to PO Box, because my real address will be secret that you are not knowing at this time.

Thanks Farooq, you sexy Pakistani, you.

You could always write him a poem to show your love.



Farooq, my little foreign man
You live so far, in Pakistan.
I bet you're tired of all the sand
But you probably have a killer tan!

I want for you to meet my mom
But promise you won't bring a bomb.
We'll tell her that you are from Guam
So don't say "Lakem Ah Salam".

Life is a desert, and you are my mirage
My love is a grenade you cannot dodge
I bought you a turban, it's camoflauge!
It's in a box in my garage.




(I could go on, but you get the point.)

Okay, if you insist.....


Dear Farooq, you are one hairy mammal,
In fact, you look much like a beast.
But it's cool, because you match with your camel,
And I love guys from the Middle East.

Oh Farooq, your English is bad,
And your breath smells just like Old Spice.
But for you, I would go to Baghdad
Because your e-mail was so very nice. (I read it twice.)

Oh Farooq, your beard is so long
And your toenails, well they are long, too.
I bet you've got one hell of a schlong,
And I hope you know just what to do!

Oh Farooq, I know people stare
And my parents, well you kinda scare 'em
But damnit, I don't even care
I still want to be in your harem!

My dearest Farooq,

I love that towel upon your head.
I love your dot. It's so bright red.
I love your house, it's like a shed.
I love you so much, Farooq Ahmed.

I love your flip-flops, they are neat.
They look good on your dark brown feet.
I love it that you don't eat meat.
You worship cows, and that sure is sweet.

You don't have a car, but you sure can run
You don't have money, but you have a machine gun
You really like war, it must be fun!
You don't even care that you've never won.

I like it when you misbehave.
I like it that you never shave.
I want to be your little slave
And live inside a mountain cave.

In that case, Forensix should send him this:


Farooq Ahmed, I'll be damn.
You are not from Pakistan.
Your e-mail is just stupid spam
You broke my heart you evil man!

I knew you sounded kinda cocky
You're not even a camel jockey.
I bet your name is Dave or Rocky
Your probably from Vermont or Milwaukee

I thought I'd died and gone to heaven
I thought you owned a 7-11

Great! You just gave me some new material.

Did your e-mail sound like this?.........

Hello, my name's canaryass
My cooter's wet, but I've got gas.

I really hope you get this e-mail
I'm ready for you, if you can stand the smell.

I'm only 16, but my boobs are big.
I don't have a turban, but I do have a wig.

I want you Farooq, can you give me a hand?
Will you make love to me in the hot dry sand?

I'll grab your butt, it is so hairy.
I want you to scream "Canary! Canary!"

If you reply to this e-mail it would really rock.
Because I'm hungry for your Pakastani cock!

No problem.


Howdy Farookey, what 'n the heck were you thinkin'
When you sent me that e-mail, have you been a drinkin'?

I opened that sucker up, and I said DAD GUM!
This poor ol' Pakistani fellar show is dumb!

Them things you was sayin kinda sounded impure.
If my daddy/uncle sees 'em, he'll kill ya for sure.

You better run for the hills with your fancy towel hat
Cuz here in the south we don't take too kindly to that!

Sneaky likes to play with his cock.
He does it with a dirty sock.

And when he's done at the end of the day
He doesn't throw the sock away!

He cuddles with it in his bed.
It's always horny. It gives him head.

At work, he keeps it in his pocket.
When he gets wood, he takes a break to "sock it".

You think that's gross, but if you only knew
What Sneaky does with his favorite shoe!

He watches the Playboy channel, and takes a gamble
That one day for a second it might unscramble.

You may know people that you think are freaky
But they don't hold a candle to sock-fucking Sneaky!

I really could do this all the time
It's really somewhat mysterious.
But if all my posts contained a rhyme
Then no one would take me serious.

Well, you asked. Remember, this is all in fun.


There once was a girl named Marie
She had a split personality

I'll write her a poem, like she asked me to do
But I don't know which one I am writing it to!

There were a few members that gave her a hassle
She doesn't like KJ, she thinks he's an asshole.

When that would come up, her personalities split
And all four of her aliases would start talking shit!

Now part of this story doesn't totally suck
because Marie and Foensix are trying to hook up!

So let the girls go, whatever the reason.
If Marie is involved, it's already a threesome!

Just when you thought
This thread was a goner
I say "no it's not!"
And I'll make it go longer.

Farooq may be desperate
But I see other hard-dicks
Just look at these leg humpers
begging for pics!

This thread got off topic
The real question at hand,
is Forensix gonna marry
this guy from sand land?

I think that she ought to,
and if the marriage should spoil
She can scream out "I got you!"
And take half his oil!

Come on guys, your rhymes are wack.
I can do better, and I'm not even black.

Just give up now, don't look like a fool.
I don't want to have to take you to school.

Oh, I see, you wanna bring up that stuff?
Like being with her isn't work enough?

I'm gonna make it official and do the right thing.
But her greedy ass wants a 5 carat ring!

Well as of right now, I haven't even been contested.
And if the rhyme police come, you're the one gettin' arrested.

Your rhymes are so weak, and your timing is poor.
Your style is a mess, pick it up off the floor.

A crazy ol' e-mail is how this began.
It was sent to Forensix by a guy in Pakistan.
We've started to rhyme now, so that is our plan.
If you want to ignore the first pages, you can!

You're such a goobersmooch, Cobra R
You try to bust rhymes, but don't get very far.

Your luck with the ladies is probably sub-par
You ain't got much skills, so I hope you have a nice car!

[bcoop]

Awesome!

[joes01bullitt]

WTF!

Does 'Rick Modena' need to BAN a bitch?!?

Damn straight!

[jluv]

Ha! That's really old stuff. Good times.

[talisman]

Good times!

[Snatch Napkin]

Ah yes, the good ol' days....

...before we grew old and boring or too busy with work.

[STRONGNUFF]

Good times!

Talisman vs gc2 thread from years back

[Baba Ganoush]

Dan Bishop thread gets my vote

[idrivea4banger]

i just read that whole uber toten thread....again. holy hell.

x2 on Dan Bishop

[Chili]

i just read that whole uber toten thread....again. holy hell.

x2 on Dan Bishop

All I can say is I am glad I met you last week. You look curiously awesome!

[Geor!]

All I can say is I am glad I met you last week. You look curiously awesome!

Bi-curiously, right? I knew there was something odd about you, Craig.


I haven't read the Uber Toten Schlager thread. Is it good?