An abundance of hormones at that age will make you forget silly shit like the fact that you weigh 95lbs.
These may have been answered already, but...
Where is the kid's real father, and if he is involved, how is the situation between Mom & Dad? Is it amicable?
What was his mother's reaction to calling her a hoe?
I see that this seems to be isolated to 2 events. Other than that, is he generally a good kid? Good grades? Is he involved in sports?
His real father just got out of jail for CC fraud and theft. When he was arrested it was discovered that he was using Kai ( the kid ) to go in and steal high value shit from stores when he was 10 or so. He has zero involvement with him now, by his fathers choice.
He's generally pretty polite and semi shy. He makes ok grade. He is in mostly AP classes, but doesn't put any effort into it. When he was 12 the school sent him to UNT to be tested because they thought he was " gifted " . Apparently the results put him as Genius level. Personally I have always thought that he was a sociopath. This is the only time I have ever witnessed real emotion from him. Usually he doesn't care about anything, or doesn't show it any ways. He was a sponsored COD player on Xbox for a while. So naturally when he was grounded we would take his xbox away. He didn't care, he would just sleep all day.
BTW, this I will say for certain.. The only reason you should 'hold him down' as mentioned in the first post, is if he is, in fact, physically assaulting someone (you, mom, anyone) aka self-defense. Or destroying property. Other than that, I would not physically touch him or you're likely to go to jail..
BTW, you haven't said (or I missed it) how long have you been in the picture? Again, I think that has a lot to do with what level of involvement you have. If the kid was already older when you showed up, it is going to be difficult for him to take anything you offer as coming from a loving place. You're just going to be the asshole step-dad, no matter what.
I wouldn't take it physical until he did. With that being said, if he was a man, I would have clocked him as soon as he got in my face.
We've dated from close to two years, lived with each other for 8ish months now. I've seen him hanging out with these white trash wigger types at the park a few times, and I think that's where he is getting all this from.... Or he snuck into straight outta compton.
I'd get some flyers from different boarding and military schools and lay them randomly around the house. Trump graduated from the NY Military Academy and he turned out alright.
There's only a few really good answer to your questions here, Chili and Bcoop since theirs are the only two I can remember from reading the entire thread.
First off, these are my opinions, your probably not going to follow any of the good advise given here, but here goes nothing.
You and his mother need to respect his privacy. You walked in on him getting his freak on (you'd be fucking pissed too). By respect I mean knocking on the door BEFORE you walk in, I don't want to see a naked 15 year old girl or boy. Yes, you all did say no one in the house, but really, chicks don't count, I sneaked in plenty of hoes in my room when I was a young "playa" (never got caught either). Also, teenagers need privacy regardless of their age. You can peek through their shit when they are not there, it is your house after all.
Second, Like Chili already said, its a hard thing being a step father, but seeing as you haven't stepped up to the plate and married his mom and take full responsibility for this young chap (that obviously needs a father figure in his life) you really can't say or do anything until you do. You also already stated that you have "time put in" on this relationship, then step up and marry her or move out. "You can't love the mother if you can't love her kids"
Third, all of these problems are coming from guess what? POOR PARENTING! A 15 year old at the park hanging with wiggers? No sports or advanced learning classes to keep him occupied? Taking away his xbox and then allowing him to sleep all day? I know the lawn needs mowing, trash needs to be taken out and I'm sure his room is a fucking mess.
Of course he's lashing out, because he knows (because of poor parenting) that nothing is going to happen, just a bunch of empty threats of screaming and yelling.
Kids need guidance and good parenting, I suggest you two grow a pair and step up to the plate* in your won respective ways...
*This last comment has nothing to do with being a tough guy either.
Originally posted by Silverback
Look all you want, she can't find anyone else who treats her as bad as I do, and I keep her self esteem so low, she wouldn't think twice about going anywhere else.
There's only a few really good answer to your questions here, Chili and Bcoop since theirs are the only two I can remember from reading the entire thread.
First off, these are my opinions, your probably not going to follow any of the good advise given here, but here goes nothing.
You and his mother need to respect his privacy. You walked in on him getting his freak on (you'd be fucking pissed too). By respect I mean knocking on the door BEFORE you walk in, I don't want to see a naked 15 year old girl or boy. Yes, you all did say no one in the house, but really, chicks don't count, I sneaked in plenty of hoes in my room when I was a young "playa" (never got caught either). Also, teenagers need privacy regardless of their age. You can peek through their shit when they are not there, it is your house after all.
Second, Like Chili already said, its a hard thing being a step father, but seeing as you haven't stepped up to the plate and married his mom and take full responsibility for this young chap (that obviously needs a father figure in his life) you really can't say or do anything until you do. You also already stated that you have "time put in" on this relationship, then step up and marry her or move out. "You can't love the mother if you can't love her kids"
Third, all of these problems are coming from guess what? POOR PARENTING! A 15 year old at the park hanging with wiggers? No sports or advanced learning classes to keep him occupied? Taking away his xbox and then allowing him to sleep all day? I know the lawn needs mowing, trash needs to be taken out and I'm sure his room is a fucking mess.
Of course he's lashing out, because he knows (because of poor parenting) that nothing is going to happen, just a bunch of empty threats of screaming and yelling.
Kids need guidance and good parenting, I suggest you two grow a pair and step up to the plate* in your won respective ways...
*This last comment has nothing to do with being a tough guy either.
I don't disagree with you. He's never had anyone to follow through with a punishment before. He's actually really clean. He doesn't like mess at all. No lawn to mow, and we don't produce that much trash...
And he is in AP classes, and even has a few off campus classes at TCC.
Also, the privacy thing... He came out and talked to us, and then went into the restroom. She wen't in there to retrieve his laundry. It's not like we opened the door and yelled " Surprise, Cockfag!"
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