Tweet
I tell ya there are some days where you meet someone and all you can do is think of different ways to kill them. Get off work and I am hot and hungry so I stop at Stripes because I like their chicken salad sandwiches and needed smokes anyway. So I park on the far end away from everyone else because I dont like door dings. I sit there for a moment enjoying the AC when the biggest POS twin of my truck parks right next to me. There are 12 other spots open WAY closer yet he has to park there. He whips his door open and it slams into my newish chrome mirror. I get out and make a comment that he needs to be more careful and that he just chipped my mirror. He says "Well its an old truck, it will get dents." Just because your 96 is beat to shit does not mean I beat on mine. He continues to walk in. Cashier sees me and says "Perfect timing, just made the last chicken salad sandwich" as she knows I usually stop for one. She sets it on the counter and I go for a nice cold bottle of orange juice but guess whos there? Mr Ass hole. He starts to get a coughing fit and I can see the chuncks of flem flying everywhere as he proceeds to open the cooler with the juice and just stand there coughing with all his might over ever single fucking bottle of juice in the damn thing. Argh! Screw it, guess gatoraide it is. I grab a few other things and go to the counter and hes already checking out and I see a different cashier throwing my chicken sandwich in his bag. I say hey that was made for me and the other cashier set it there for me. Old bastard turns around and says "Well I got it first. Looks like you dont need it anyway." I dropped my drink and chips on the ground and was about to beat the ever loving shit out of this ass hat when I hear the guy behind me shout "Bill!" and I turn around. Its my customer thats a homicide detective and he just says "Aint worth it man." Good point. So I pick up my shit and pay for it and go outside just in time to see old ass hat slam his door into my mirror again! I now no longer have a Gatorade because I whipped it at his truck with all my might. It exploded on his door and a lot went inside through his open window. He gives me the finger and peels out of there like a mad man just as my customer walks out and asked if it was the same guy. I said yeah. He smiled and said "Want me to go get him for exhibition of speed and unsafe driving?" Hell yeah! I say. His tail lights are out too! I even drove up Robinson drive to see if he did. Yup, sure did and he had a Robinson cop car right with him to write the ticket. 
Fucking asshole. I hope that ruined his whole day because i am still hungry and still have a new mirror that is now chipped.
Fucking asshole. I hope that ruined his whole day because i am still hungry and still have a new mirror that is now chipped.
Comment