Anyone dealing with an aging relative?

[Sean88gt]

my grandmother is getting into the stage where she doesn't eat.

I decided long ago that if this happens to me I will kill myself during one of the fleeting moments of clarity. The biggest reason will sound materialistic, I have spent years building up a financial advantage for my wife and kids, i won't watch them waste it on me.

Exactly.

[Broncojohnny]

After seeing my Father-in-law going through it, I have had thoughts of stashing a cyanide pill away in something so that I could get access to it if needed.

Just FYI, contrary to popular opinion, and from what I have read about Jonestown, cyanide is a painful way to die.

[jluv]

Just FYI, contrary to popular opinion, and from what I have read about Jonestown, cyanide is a painful way to die.

I think jumping off a cliff would be my choice, if I could get to one. After dropping about 10 tabs of X, of course.

[Denny]

Just FYI, contrary to popular opinion, and from what I have read about Jonestown, cyanide is a painful way to die.

Morphine still, and will always, trump all.

[Gasser64]

Yeah, I must be a horrible relative. I've written off "family" for a lot less.

Same here. Might sound heartless but, so is leading you down the road to ruin. And if they were in their right mind, and they wouldn't have lead you down the road to ruin, then there is no shame in taking care of things the easy way because you know they wouldn't want to do this to you.

You have to ask, what happens to people like this who have no family, and no one at all to take care of them? Do they just get everything repo'd, and get shoved out into the road until they finally die? No. They wind up in a sub par nursing home.

[Frank]

I deliver for Meals on Wheels near where I live. I'm impressed with some of the apartments I have come across built in garages and such. One couple has a beautiful little brick house with garage and a big open floor plan easily navigable with wheelchairs. They still drive I guess. Its just a few steps away from the main house. That would be almost ideal up to a point. I hope I can do something like that if I have to.

[Captain Crawfish]

If you can't take care of her rhe state will. It probably will be crappy care though. The people in those homes don't give a fuck

[David]

If you can't take care of her rhe state will. It probably will be crappy care though. The people in those homes don't give a fuck

Yeah they create guardianship and ripoff the estate.

[matts5.0]

Fuck your life, I'm not a nice person, I would let her rot.

[Denny]

I've inspected many nursing homes and assisted living centers throughout the state. I can tell you one thing; none of them provide the level of care that I would think that my family deserves.

Fucking nursing homes... where people ditch their elderly. I've been all over this world and no one does it like us. Hell, we didn't do it until recent past. Families took care of their own like the rest of the world and historically. We are far too busy with ourselves to do anything petty like taking care of those who took care of us. Granted, our society demands that every able working body slave all day at a job just to make ends meet. We are fucking ourselves out of civility one family role at a time.No more caring for your elderly. Traditional house wives are almost a thing of the past. Next, childhood will end sooner.

I've been asked by many as to which places are good. I tell them anywhere with relatives. Even if advanced care or additional help is needed, have them come out to the house. The only provider that I can think of that I've heard no complaints from is Visiting Angels. They seem to have a better quality of employees. They come by and care when no one is there, then leave when needed.

If you're needing constant advanced nursing, that is one thing, but I will tell you they will be neglected (at least to a certain extent). Hospice shouldn't be needed until the end and it would be great if they lived out their last home stretch around loved one in a familiar environment; not some loud, smelly place with rude strangers, paid to track your final moments.

[ceyko]

Same here. Might sound heartless but, so is leading you down the road to ruin. And if they were in their right mind, and they wouldn't have lead you down the road to ruin, then there is no shame in taking care of things the easy way because you know they wouldn't want to do this to you.

You have to ask, what happens to people like this who have no family, and no one at all to take care of them? Do they just get everything repo'd, and get shoved out into the road until they finally die? No. They wind up in a sub par nursing home.

What they do when they lost their mind is one thing, but when still sane that where I make my go/no-go decisions.

[Sean88gt]

I've inspected many nursing homes and assisted living centers throughout the state. I can tell you one thing; none of them provide the level of care that I would think that my family deserves.

Fucking nursing homes... where people ditch their elderly. I've been all over this world and no one does it like us. Hell, we didn't do it until recent past. Families took care of their own like the rest of the world and historically. We are far too busy with ourselves to do anything petty like taking care of those who took care of us. Granted, our society demands that every able working body slave all day at a job just to make ends meet. We are fucking ourselves out of civility one family role at a time.No more caring for your elderly. Traditional house wives are almost a thing of the past. Next, childhood will end sooner.

I've been asked by many as to which places are good. I tell them anywhere with relatives. Even if advanced care or additional help is needed, have them come out to the house. The only provider that I can think of that I've heard no complaints from is Visiting Angels. They seem to have a better quality of employees. They come by and care when no one is there, then leave when needed.

If you're needing constant advanced nursing, that is one thing, but I will tell you they will be neglected (at least to a certain extent). Hospice shouldn't be needed until the end and it would be great if they lived out their last home stretch around loved one in a familiar environment; not some loud, smelly place with rude strangers, paid to track your final moments.

My wife's grandmother is fighting cancer (and a host of other issues). She was living with her youngest daughter, who was having a hell of a time with it all. They ended up getting her into a rehab facility, where they are trying to help her.

No one wanted to stick her in a home, she didn't want to go, and it's started to shred what has been an otherwise close family.

My 11 yr old daughter asked why she could just make the decision to be "put down". She laid out why she thought it would be beneficial, how her memaw wasn't living a life at all and rather waiting to die, and that if it's in God's time, then she would know when the right time to take a graceful exit would be.

An 11 year old gets it, but over half of this country is fucking clueless.

[Denny]

There are extinuating circumstances where the nursing homes are beneficial, but if they were just utilized in that capacity, they wouldn't be overcrowded and understaffed. The system isn't being used for what it was designed for.

[Denny]

Well, then spend a shit load of money to make their last year's on earth hell.

[LaserSVT]

Fuck this day. A close friend and all around good guy died of a heart attack this morning not 30 minutes after speaking with me. I got a call a few hours later from his daughter and she told me what happened. Been on my mind all day and I am very worried about his wife knowing just how tight his financials were so I was seeing what i could put together to buy the casket. Hes a veteran and I know his plot is taken care of but still lots of expenses.
Then I get the call from the reverse mortgage company. Sure enough my grandmother has not made a single payment of the back taxes she owes them because they had paid the property taxes for 3 years. I made a big payment and set her up to pay them a minimal amount and walked her through the process 100 times (no joke) of how to make the payment but they aint been made. So they want me to pay a couple grand or kick her out.
This call is followed by none other than granny. Power gets turned off tomorrow. She has no idea where her money is. Its $600. Six hundred fucking dollars for electricity. WTF? And being that its Navarro Electric they dont take cards...... *kill me* ... so I have to drive 65 miles out there tomorrow in the middle of my work day to pay her fucking light bill.

I cant take any more of this shit. I have to put her in a home. She says she wont go because she wants her dog but that dog is a POS and needs to be put down. As quickly as she forgets I am sure she wont ever remember the dog after a couple days.

She did call me in a frantic state earlier telling me Jack (my grandfather) just left and is on the way to see me. Hes been dead 5 years.

I find myself starring at a blank wall all to often.