How did this happen to me? Getting Divorced.

[likeitfast55]

Get an attorney, and now. Seriously, take the rest of the day off to make some calls to attorneys. The longer you wait, the farther ahead her attorney will get. David Donahue would be my recommendation.

http://www.kfd-law.com/

DO NOT fight with her. DO NOT yell, cuss, etc. Don't even ask her why she wants the divorce. I know you feel like you need to know, but you don't need to know. Chances are you don't want to know. Closure is overrated, especially when she's about to fuck you with no lube. Don't call her, don't text her, don't communicate with her about anything other than the child involved. RECORD ALL CONVERSATIONS. Don't tell her you're recording anything. She doesn't need a heads up as to what you're doing. It is admissable in court. You're hoping to catch her slipping, so you MUST bite your tongue.

Great advice. Do all the above and hire a "Divorce" lawyer ASAP. If she served first, her mind is made up....period. Move forward, painful as it is right now.

[Sean88gt]

In general, are all our assets on lock down now that I've been served?

Such as cash? I'd check the account and empty that motherfucker if there is anything in it.

[talisman]

In general, are all our assets on lock down now that I've been served?

Not necessarily. I had stock options that I cashed out to protect and was going to "gift" them to my sister if things got nasty. I'd drain out whatever money you can before she does.

[bcoop]

This gets repeated on here often, but rather than make you dig, I'll post it again. It doesn't matter why she wants a divorce. Short of abuse on your part, the court does not care. It doesn't matter if you cheated, it doesn't matter if she cheated. The judge, attorney, etc, don't care. As someone else has stated, if you've been served, her mind is made up. You're past the point of no return. Rather than get hung up on the emotional side of things (I know, it's difficult), seek counsel immediately and start building your case. It really is the only option you have.

[Dave586]

This gets repeated on here often, but rather than make you dig, I'll post it again. It doesn't matter why she wants a divorce. Short of abuse on your part, the court does not care. It doesn't matter if you cheated, it doesn't matter if she cheated. The judge, attorney, etc, don't care. As someone else has stated, if you've been served, her mind is made up. You're past the point of no return. Rather than get hung up on the emotional side of things (I know, it's difficult), seek counsel immediately and start building your case. It really is the only option you have.

And..she has probably been planning this for a while. She already has documentation against you - and you don't even realize it. Start a journal today of everything you can think of that's happened in the last six months that you can use against her. She has the attorney - she is asking for full custody - full child support 20% of your income plus half medical, limited visitation/supervised visitation - she is steaming to fuck you with everything she can - and she has been planning it. You haven't.

Any mental issues in the last six months?

Use of recreational/illigal drugs in the last six months?

Has she said she wanted to kill anyone in the last six months?

Any witnesses to any "unusual" acts/behavior with her?

You need to start writing stuff down now. It will come in handy.

[Jester]

Trust me, she will throw anything and everything at you that she can make up. She will have friends, parents, man hating divorced bitch friends, and lawyers all whispering in her ear, and she will show you that you actually knew NOTHING about the person you were married to. Just keep your cool and build a case.

[Dave586]

oh- and try not to post anything relevent to the case here in a thread - chances are she is reading this - if she knows your screen names. If you need to talk to someone on here about it - then pm them.

Change all online account passwords
Start a new email address - and start using it
Get a PO Box - and foward all your mail to it.

[Jester]

chances are she is reading your emails............... yes, she will do that. she will hack your shit. guaranfuckintee!

[Denny]

Sell the hell out of everything and stash the cash. Plant some coke in her car and take one of her tail lights out.

Thank me later.

[Grant]

There is a lot of truth in this thread..and most of it is in jest. Good luck to you down the road - 18 years is tough.

[talisman]

oh- and try not to post anything relevent to the case here in a thread - chances are she is reading this - if she knows your screen names. If you need to talk to someone on here about it - then pm them.

Change all online account passwords
Start a new email address - and start using it
Get a PO Box - and foward all your mail to it.

Yup.

Sun Tzu was talking about war, but he might as well have been talking about divorce:

All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near. Hold out baits to entice the enemy. Feign disorder, and crush him.

[Hunter]

Sell the hell out of everything and stash the cash. Plant some coke in her car and take one of her tail lights out.

Thank me later.

I like this plan.