How did this happen to me? Getting Divorced.

[BradM]

6 months is not the same as 18 years....

Also need newdz in funfordcobra's case.

[4.6coupe]

child custody battle=deep pockets, attorney

Good luck.

[White_lightning]

wow.. just wow.. i've been married for 11 years and together for almost 17.. i dont know how i would react if she told me it was over..

Good luck ... and as hard as it is right now you have to fight for YOU and your kid.. Lawyer up and go for the throat..

[Jester]

You never know a woman until you meet her in court. Women can be selfish vindictive cunts with no remorse for anything they do that hurts you.

Good luck!

[jyro]

make a list of all assets you had before marriage, where the house down payment came from, any houses you owned before marriage that were sold for the down payment, money that family gave you before marriage ect. All that should not be part of the divorce settlement. Open a new account and transfer any funds she left you into it. You'll have to giveup 50% of any savings and the 401 if you have one. Sorry for your problems, mid-life crisis with the wife can be bad for all. Her single friends out partying and all. Get served, ignore her, live your life.

After she has a fling or two and actually samples single life, she may realize what she lost and come back. it hurts to ignore her and all she does, but been there done that. use whatever money you have left and rent a apt. and wait and see what shit happens, ignore her. it happened to me, we got the divorce but never finalized it, after a year she came back. we were married for 14 years, she was 36 when she had her midlife crisis.

go with joint custody. and the simplest split of all assets you can come up with. when it's not your weekend to keep the kid and she wants you to keep the kid so she can party, tell her no, you already have plans.

if she comes back, forgive and forget, you'll never trust her the same tho.

[talisman]

Jyro has good advice.

[CWO]

Why do you need a lawyer? She gets what she is entitled to and there is not much you can do about it. You need to both do up a list of what you want to take with you when the marriage is over, then discuss the things that are in conflict. (Not fight, discuss) You do that , no need for another lawyer. Not every divorce has to be a knock down drag out fight to the end. Make the best of a bad thing. Especially for your kid.

Couldn't agree more. The most important thing here is your 6 year old. Do what's best for him/her no matter what.

[Treybiz]

:face palm:

+1, really? really?


And the OP.. That sucks man. Hope you can end it somewhat peacefully.

[Sean88gt]

Why do you need a lawyer? She gets what she is entitled to and there is not much you can do about it. You need to both do up a list of what you want to take with you when the marriage is over, then discuss the things that are in conflict. (Not fight, discuss) You do that , no need for another lawyer. Not every divorce has to be a knock down drag out fight to the end. Make the best of a bad thing. Especially for your kid.

I get what you're saying, but you're asking a couple that has lost the ability to communicate to sit down and amicably work through the most minute details.

[bcoop]

Im in the same boat.

Nobody saw that one coming... I've never been able to understand why people who break up, get back together. People split for a reason, they should stay that way. It rarely works out. I've got no sympathy for you though, because everyone here told you what was going to happen.

Why do you need a lawyer? She gets what she is entitled to and there is not much you can do about it. You need to both do up a list of what you want to take with you when the marriage is over, then discuss the things that are in conflict. (Not fight, discuss) You do that , no need for another lawyer. Not every divorce has to be a knock down drag out fight to the end. Make the best of a bad thing. Especially for your kid.

It would be great if they could, but like others have said, women are vindictive. You ever want to find out how much your wife hates you, just wait til she drags it all out during the divorce. She can't even discuss the possibility of working it out, there is no way this ends amicably. It's going to be a fight.

make a list of all assets you had before marriage, where the house down payment came from, any houses you owned before marriage that were sold for the down payment, money that family gave you before marriage ect. All that should not be part of the divorce settlement. Open a new account and transfer any funds she left you into it. You'll have to giveup 50% of any savings and the 401 if you have one. Sorry for your problems, mid-life crisis with the wife can be bad for all. Her single friends out partying and all. Get served, ignore her, live your life.

After she has a fling or two and actually samples single life, she may realize what she lost and come back. it hurts to ignore her and all she does, but been there done that. use whatever money you have left and rent a apt. and wait and see what shit happens, ignore her. it happened to me, we got the divorce but never finalized it, after a year she came back. we were married for 14 years, she was 36 when she had her midlife crisis.

go with joint custody. and the simplest split of all assets you can come up with. when it's not your weekend to keep the kid and she wants you to keep the kid so she can party, tell her no, you already have plans.

if she comes back, forgive and forget, you'll never trust her the same tho.

Fuck that.

OP - I've got a great attorney, but he's far from cheap. If you go for 50/50 custody, demand no child support. Offer to pay for the kid's healthcare, but no financial support. A custody battle is going to cost you $20,000 and up.

If you just want standard custody, fight to alternate years on claiming the child as your dependent. Be firm but fair. Take your feelings out of it, it's strictly a negotiation at this point. DO NOT worry about her feelings. I promise you, she isn't worried about yours.

[Dave586]

i used Grubbs and Goeller for my divorce. He isn't the most expensive - and pretty knowledgable.


In any case - welcome to a new chapter in your life. Good luck.

[silverranger]

Nobody saw that one coming... I've never been able to understand why people who break up, get back together. People split for a reason, they should stay that way. It rarely works out. I've got no sympathy for you though, because everyone here told you what was going to happen.




It would be great if they could, but like others have said, women are vindictive. You ever want to find out how much your wife hates you, just wait til she drags it all out during the divorce. She can't even discuss the possibility of working it out, there is no way this ends amicably. It's going to be a fight.




Fuck that.

OP - I've got a great attorney, but he's far from cheap. If you go for 50/50 custody, demand no child support. Offer to pay for the kid's healthcare, but no financial support. A custody battle is going to cost you $20,000 and up.

If you just want standard custody, fight to alternate years on claiming the child as your dependent. Be firm but fair. Take your feelings out of it, it's strictly a negotiation at this point. DO NOT worry about her feelings. I promise you, she isn't worried about yours.

This guy right here helped me in my battle listen to him, I got everything and more than I was first going for. It sucks but yes take your feelings out of it I didn't and got screwed the first time. But now I get my son almost 50/50 and he is 14 months woohoo. Stay strong if you ever need anything pm me for my number I can give you all the advice I know. Ever need to drink a cold beer and vent give me a call.

Good luck sir

[Thehead]

Call Nancy Thompson. Her office is on 75 by SMU and she does family law. Very good and women lawyers can be very ruthless.

Nancy Nall Thompson
Law Office of Nancy Nall Thompson
6116 N. Central Expressway Ste. 901
Dallas, Texas 75206
Tel: (214)369-0656
Fax: (214)369-2980

Tell her Christian Hoyle sent you

[David]

Worked for me. Kept my house, my car, and she cut me some slack on child support. No need to piss them off. They were good enough to have your child, so no reason not to keep it respectful. I got the lawyer and told him to disclose everything to her, there were to be no secrets. We did not even fight through it all. Much like life, it is what you make it. Unless you just down right do not trust her, then it is a judgment call that he has to make.

Some people think they have to be pissed to get through something. Not true.

Last divorce I saw try to work out this way cost the family 1 million.

Lawyer up.

[Chas_svo]

Worked for me. Kept my house, my car, and she cut me some slack on child support. No need to piss them off. They were good enough to have your child, so no reason not to keep it respectful. I got the lawyer and told him to disclose everything to her, there were to be no secrets. We did not even fight through it all. Much like life, it is what you make it. Unless you just down right do not trust her, then it is a judgment call that he has to make.

Some people think they have to be pissed to get through something. Not true.

This was an exception, not the rule. Get a lawyer. You do not want to wait until you find out you need one. Advice is free, but this advice is worth tens of thousands or dollars, depending on your assets.