Favorite Sayings

[Txstang1]

In response to "if" - If a bullfrog had wings he wouldnt bump his ass when he walked.

- That's what she said

- Right on

- WHAT THE FUCK !!!!

- busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest

- it's a turd

[SVT Lurch]

When someone asked to pass the butter my grandpa would always say "Butter? Don't even know her."

"Unfortunately, i broke my give-a-shitter"

My giveadamn is broken.

I've got thisgreat new pill, works wonders for my depression - it's called fugidol.

"Its been real and its been fun, but it aint been real fun"

Or It's been real, it's been nice, it's been real nice, but I've got to go.

"You can choose any color you like, but we only have Green!" (don't know what it's from, but my wife says it a lot!)

Henry Ford - said you could have a Model T in any color as long as it was black.

[71chevellejohn]

Regarding a emrgency run to the crapper:
"My shit/fart separator is on the fritz"

[jdgregory84]

"I play real sports. I ain't tryin' to be the best at excercising."

...or just about anything else Kenny Powers says.

[Trick Pony]

They speak of my drinking, but never think of my thirst.

[YALE]

"Snookie want smush smush"-Annonamous

Anonymous?

[beaner72]

Does a bear shit in the woods?

Does Howdy Doody have wooden balls?

Is a frog's ass water tight?

Is a pigs pussy pork?

[Neon131]

Tits, or GTFO.

Oh, I've contributed so ZIP IT. Your not even from Texas.

[helosailor]

Oh, I've contributed so ZIP IT. Your not even from Texas.

Yale is more Texan than the Alamo! (add that to the sayings list)
He's just "out of the country" for a while.

[71chevellejohn]

Oh, I've contributed so ZIP IT. Your not even from Texas.

Yeah... Next time you have an idea, let it go.

[Neon131]

Yeah... Next time you have an idea, let it go.

Good idea, I didn't use your correctly.

[Blakeski]

You're fucking this monkey, I'm just holding the tail.

I heard it was "I'm fuckin this chicken, you just sit there and hold the tail up"

[HUNCH]

"If it ain't white, it ain't right"

"If it's black, give it back"

"If it's brown, turn it down"

"I like my women like I like my trucks. Big, black, and dirty"

"If it ain't pink, it's gonna stink"

"You're as useless as a one legged man in an ass kicking contest"

"Wrap it before you tap it"

"Hit it and quit it"

"Even the sun shines on a dog's ass every now and then"

"Shut your mouth when you're talking to me"

[YALE]

Yale is more Texan than the Alamo! (add that to the sayings list)
He's just "out of the country" for a while.

¡Simón! ¡Tejas por vida!

[Leah]

You're fucking this monkey, I'm just holding the tail.

Regarding a emrgency run to the crapper:
"My shit/fart separator is on the fritz"

Those are both hysterical!

My dad always used to say "The devil is beating his wife" when it was raining while the sun was out.

Also, when he saw a BIG line of traffic coming and he was trying to turn out into it, he would say, "Who left the gate open?"