Things that every redneck know...

[fitzwell]

What six ways from sundown is, and who shot John.

[ThreeFingerPete]

How accurate is "It can shoot the nuts off a gnat at 500"?

Seems pretty self explanatory

[Vertnut]

It'll pin yer ears back

"You could put a $5 bill on the dash..."

[CJ-95GT]

How to assemble and disassemble a shot gun before the age of 10.

[Swamp Donkey]

If you could shit through a keyhole without splattering

[kainzien]

Can a ugly girl really "run a mad dog off of a meat wagon"?
how fast is fast enough to "hang its tongue out" and "pin its ears back".
how bad does "a bag full of assholes really smell" or "hot trash".
can you luck really be bad enough to " fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking a dick"
are there really women fine enough to "drink their bath water" or "eat the corn out of their shit"

[Sleeper]

Don't eat the yellow snow.

[krazy kris]

Can a ugly girl really "run a mad dog off of a meat wagon"?
how fast is fast enough to "hang its tongue out" and "pin its ears back".
how bad does "a bag full of assholes really smell" or "hot trash".
can you luck really be bad enough to " fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking a dick"
are there really women fine enough to "drink their bath water" or "eat the corn out of their shit"

I have never heard that one before LMMFAO

[Frank]

Ugly girl. "She fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down"
Something moving fast "He was haulin' mail". This is an expression my East Texas uncle has used before I had never heard anyone else use it.
Burnt Slap Up.
Referring to someone worthless: "Either he don't care or he's stupid, but whatever it is, its a whole lot of one and a little bit of the other."

[BlackGT]

Seems pretty self explanatory

You ever seen a gnat sit still for longer than 1/10 of a second?

[juiceweezl]

Just how long is a coon's age?

[redrocket5.0]

How does she " Suck the chrome of a trailer ball"?

Or Suck a golfball through a garden hose?

[ThreeFingerPete]

You ever seen a gnat sit still for longer than 1/10 of a second?

What's your point? The saying gives you a distance and a spread. A completely quantifiable measure.

[TexasT]

How does she " Suck the chrome of a trailer ball"?

Or Suck a golfball through a garden hose?

I never actually witnessed anyone doing it in person, but I've run across a few girls I would vouch for if they asked me to.

I always heard "if it was raining pu$$y, he'd get hit with a Dick" to gauge unluckiness.

And just how ugly is a kid they had to tie raw meat around his neck to get the dog to play with him.