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  • What a big dick...

    Another lovely TSA story



    Jonah Falcon, Man With World's Largest Penis, Frisked By TSA At California Airport


    Turns out it's legal to have a weapon of mass conception at the airport.

    Jonah Falcon was stopped and frisked by the TSA at the San Francisco International Airport on July 9 because of a bulging package hidden in his pants. But the 41-year-old New Yorker wasn't packing a dirty bomb, drugs or a Costco-sized tube of toothpaste. The New Yorker has the world's largest recorded penis.

    In an exclusive interview with The Huffington Post, Falcon described his hard times with security guards after his extra carry-on became suspect.

    "I had my 'stuff' strapped to the left. I wasn't erect at the time," said Falcon, whose penis is 9 inches flaccid, 13.5 inches erect. "One of the guards asked if my pockets were empty and I said, 'Yes.'"

    Falcon said he knew that his interview was about to get a lot more personal when he was led through one of the X-ray body scanners and passed a metal detector.

    "Another guard stopped me and asked me if I had some sort of growth," Falcon said, laughing.

    Indeed he did have a growth.

    By the age of 18, Falcon knew he had something special when his manhood reached a whopping 12 inches. His family jewel was hailed as the world's largest on record after an HBO documentary featured him in 1999. The Guinness Book of World Records does not record such feats, but Falcon did show his standout feature to Huffington Post executive editor Buck Wolf.

    Falcon has been contacted by porn companies (though he's never accepted) and has been featured on just about every talkshow in the country.

    As he passed through airport security, Falcon said a younger security guard felt threatened by his "very noticeable" package -- and interpreted it as a biological threat.

    "I said, 'It's my dick,'" Falcon said. "He gave me a pat down but made sure to go around [my penis] with his hands. They even put some powder on my pants, probably a test for explosives. I found it amusing."

    The screener gave up the extensive search without so much as a blush or a smile. Falcon made his flight back to New York on time.

    But he learned something that day. The hardened traveler has a new game plan for airport security.

    "I'm just gonna wear bike shorts from now on," Falcon said. "That way, they'll know. You'd think the San Francisco TSA would have had experience with hung guys before, but I guess not."

    TSA officials at the San Francisco International Airport did not return calls for comment.

  • #2
    Some women may disagree. That IS a weapon.

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    • #3
      This is DFWMustangs....we all have 13 inches and bang super models!

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      • #4
        That guy and his poor little penis, I feel bad for him.
        Originally posted by Nash B.
        Damn, man. Sorry to hear that. If it'll cheer you up, Geor swallows. And even if it doesn't cheer you up, it cheers him up.

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        • #5
          That guy's floppy dick is thrice the size of mine erect!
          How do we forget ourselves? How do we forget our minds?

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          • #6
            I empathize with that guy.

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            • #7
              George G's thread have you searching for meat or something?

              Comment


              • #8
                He wouldn't even make our Top 100. He needs to register at RiceKiller and triple their cumulative size.
                Originally posted by PGreenCobra
                I can't get over the fact that you get to go live the rest of your life, knowing that someone made a Halloween costume out of you. LMAO!!
                Originally posted by Trip McNeely
                Originally posted by dsrtuckteezy
                dont downshift!!
                Go do a whooly in front of a Peterbilt.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I hate when that shit happens.
                  When the government pays, the government controls.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    #1 reason i stopped flying.
                    .

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by The Geofster View Post
                      That guy's floppy dick is thrice the size of mine erect!


                      god damn it i spit coke all over my laptop

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                      • #12
                        2010 The Daily Show skit .....

                        This guy is a tool

                        http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tu...on-needs-a-job

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                        • #13
                          I tend to roll mine to the right. For some reason I feel it's concealed better than rolling it to the left.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by 01vnms4v View Post
                            2010 The Daily Show skit .....

                            This guy is a tool

                            http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tu...on-needs-a-job
                            LOL, "You have a 13.5 inch penis and your last name is Falcon, you were born to make porn."
                            2012 GT/CS & 93 Cobra
                            sigpic

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by 01vnms4v View Post
                              2010 The Daily Show skit .....

                              This guy is a tool

                              http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tu...on-needs-a-job
                              How is he a tool? That shit was fucking hilarious!

                              Comment

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