Are you proud of yourself?

[SEB]

WOW Don, Not sure how to reply man. I think I really just want to learn from your mistake here and Thank you for posting this thread and opening my eyes,

[Strychnine]

I wouldn't say I'm 'proud' anymore than I'd say I'm disappointed, bewildered, amused or anything else.

I think I'm an ok person who's done some ok stuff but there's always room for improvement, so I feel I'm always striving for more in all regards.

[Rick Modena]

Good luck with your endeavours my friend. Im going through the same thing in my life, my dad (biological father) was always very distant, never called unless he needed something, always heard about him going to see my step sister in Tulsa all the while passing within 2 miles of my home on his way up and back. Never called me on my bday or my kids for that matter, if I wanted to talk to him, I had to visit or call. The last year or so he has suffered a few minor strokes and lost his vision, last Thursday he had a heart attack, I recieved the call while I was at the B-9. I was overcome by emotion, regret and then it was followed by hate.
He has been smoking Salem menthols since he was twelve, my stepmonster has tried to get him help, but all he wants to do is smoke. I had to stop going over there because he wanted me to get him cigs, I did the first few times, but then I realised that all I was is a donkey to bring him what he wanted.
My family cant understand why I dont want to visit him or see him, but does he really care, Im not sure he does and ive been left to deal with the circumstances...

[DON SVO]

WOW Don, Not sure how to reply man. I think I really just want to learn from your mistake here and Thank you for posting this thread and opening my eyes,

Well it's not so much my mistakes, Sebastian, it's more of how her and I had an extremely strained relationship since I was a pre-teen... I learned a few coping mechanisms to deal with her bi-polar disorder and the associated problems that come with it when the person refuses to treat it. I firmly believe she would still be alive today if it had been dealt with 12-15 years ago.

Long story short, my mother was found dead in her home by a friend that was living with her 48 hours after I saw her. The darkness I had in me, which I maintained to keep me sane, made it very easy to withhold my emotions. Dumpycapri was spot-on. It was much easier to ice anything to avoid dealing with anymore pain or any more loss. It's been a strangely calming and refreshing moment in my life.

[talisman]

Glad you're feeling better about things Don. I might make a post later, but if I do it'll be from my laptop with a real keyboard.

[Sean88gt]

Glad you're feeling better about things Don. I might make a post later, but if I do it'll be from my laptop with a real keyboard.

I typed out a nice long one from the iphone before losing it all.

Pride is a subjective matter. There are somethings that I am very proud of, others I'm not and things I would likely change if given the reset button.

I'm in a weird place mentally right now. On one hand I'm very proud that I said 'fuck you' to the status quo and decided to do life on my terms, that I have a woman who is supportive, along for the ride and drinks from my mule, and grateful that I have 3 kids that adore me and are just as excited about the journey as I am. I've had a lot of people and friends come forward and tell me that I've been an inspiration because I didn't care for the path I was on and decided to change. Has it been difficult? Absolutely. I've literally whittled my life down to a 7' x 10' storage shed, in hopes of bettering myself. I've seen my financial standing eroded (some of this prior to school) and walked away from a business I had built from the ground up, that if sold at one point would have allowed me to retire comfortably at 30.

So I reset my path, left family, friends and the life we had known for 13 years to pursue the unknown. I set the safety net on fire and leaped. Which is apparently extraordinarily rare these days.

[DON SVO]

Glad you're feeling better about things Don. I might make a post later, but if I do it'll be from my laptop with a real keyboard.

I'd love to hear it.

[talisman]

I guess I'm proud of myself. It's hard to quantify, since there are so many aspects of life to take into consideration. I expected to have a family and possibly a kid or two by now, the house in suburbia, two car, and wall to wall, that typical Baby Boomer nuclear age fantasy that has been ingrained in our DNA since the boom time of the 50's. It didn't work out that way.

All things considered, I'm just impressed that I survived the last 9 months, intentionally or unintentionally. December 8th, I was informed that my services as a husband were no longer required. 30 years to the day after Lennon got shot 4 times in the back, I could imagine the surprise he must have felt as his blood drained from his ruptured body. I filled a pint glass with vodka, finished it, poured another and had a complete and total breakdown, while she walked out the front door without saying a word. It was the most brutal experience of my life, and that is saying something. I took a few days off work, and then just plowed through it. What else was there to do?

Things have changed. I'm concentrating on work, and if I do say so myself, my store is really kicking total ass this summer, hitting goals, and breaking records. Since over half my salary is commission, that works out well for me.

All in all, I'm pretty content. I've got a nice place, a Mustang again, virtually no bills, more disposable money than I've had since 2004, and escaped the divorce mostly intact.

I'm proud that I kept my dignity and didn't end up one of these guys you see: Completely willing to do ANYthing to avoid change, and what is going to happen 3 years down the road? She will decide it still isn't good enough and throw out the D word again, and crush your dreams a little more. Luckily I saw the warning signs and kept my wits, as rough as it was to stand myself up and not become a doormat.

I'm not happy about what happened, but I made the right choices, and now I've got the entire planet laid out for me to play in, the money to do it with, and a 5 year plan of pure awesomeness that I'm going to launch January 1, 2012. Things are good. I am proud of myself. And I should be.

[DON SVO]

I guess I'm proud of myself. It's hard to quantify, since there are so many aspects of life to take into consideration. I expected to have a family and possibly a kid or two by now, the house in suburbia, two car, and wall to wall, that typical Baby Boomer nuclear age fantasy that has been ingrained in our DNA since the boom time of the 50's. It didn't work out that way.

All things considered, I'm just impressed that I survived the last 9 months, intentionally or unintentionally. December 8th, I was informed that my services as a husband were no longer required. 30 years to the day after Lennon got shot 4 times in the back, I could imagine the surprise he must have felt as his blood drained from his ruptured body. I filled a pint glass with vodka, finished it, poured another and had a complete and total breakdown, while she walked out the front door without saying a word. It was the most brutal experience of my life, and that is saying something. I took a few days off work, and then just plowed through it. What else was there to do?

Things have changed. I'm concentrating on work, and if I do say so myself, my store is really kicking total ass this summer, hitting goals, and breaking records. Since over half my salary is commission, that works out well for me.

All in all, I'm pretty content. I've got a nice place, a Mustang again, virtually no bills, more disposable money than I've had since 2004, and escaped the divorce mostly intact.

I'm proud that I kept my dignity and didn't end up one of these guys you see: Completely willing to do ANYthing to avoid change, and what is going to happen 3 years down the road? She will decide it still isn't good enough and throw out the D word again, and crush your dreams a little more. Luckily I saw the warning signs and kept my wits, as rough as it was to stand myself up and not become a doormat.

I'm not happy about what happened, but I made the right choices, and now I've got the entire planet laid out for me to play in, the money to do it with, and a 5 year plan of pure awesomeness that I'm going to launch January 1, 2012. Things are good. I am proud of myself. And I should be.

I like that

[ELVIS]

I guess I'm proud of myself. It's hard to quantify, since there are so many aspects of life to take into consideration. I expected to have a family and possibly a kid or two by now, the house in suburbia, two car, and wall to wall, that typical Baby Boomer nuclear age fantasy that has been ingrained in our DNA since the boom time of the 50's. It didn't work out that way.

All things considered, I'm just impressed that I survived the last 9 months, intentionally or unintentionally. December 8th, I was informed that my services as a husband were no longer required. 30 years to the day after Lennon got shot 4 times in the back, I could imagine the surprise he must have felt as his blood drained from his ruptured body. I filled a pint glass with vodka, finished it, poured another and had a complete and total breakdown, while she walked out the front door without saying a word. It was the most brutal experience of my life, and that is saying something. I took a few days off work, and then just plowed through it. What else was there to do?

Things have changed. I'm concentrating on work, and if I do say so myself, my store is really kicking total ass this summer, hitting goals, and breaking records. Since over half my salary is commission, that works out well for me.

All in all, I'm pretty content. I've got a nice place, a Mustang again, virtually no bills, more disposable money than I've had since 2004, and escaped the divorce mostly intact.

I'm proud that I kept my dignity and didn't end up one of these guys you see: Completely willing to do ANYthing to avoid change, and what is going to happen 3 years down the road? She will decide it still isn't good enough and throw out the D word again, and crush your dreams a little more. Luckily I saw the warning signs and kept my wits, as rough as it was to stand myself up and not become a doormat.

I'm not happy about what happened, but I made the right choices, and now I've got the entire planet laid out for me to play in, the money to do it with, and a 5 year plan of pure awesomeness that I'm going to launch January 1, 2012. Things are good. I am proud of myself. And I should be.

all i got from this was you getting hairplugs 1/1/12. amirite??

god bless.

[Nash B.]

all i got from this was you getting hairplugs 1/1/12. amirite??

god bless.

Are you going to see if you can get a group buy set up?

[YALE]

I've never really considered being proud of myself. I just know I'll never be satisfied with myself.

[Trip McNeely]

Sometimes it takes a real kick in the ass event to realize your surroundings and what you have. Glad to see you have made amends. It makes you a better person all around. I used to live by the philosophy of half empty, but lately its been half full and it has worked out well for me. Live and live well, you never know when your time is up.

[War Machine]

I had a really screwed up childhood and I have a lot of mommy and daddy issues with my parents. I know when they pass I will wish I spent more time with them, but right now I can't really force myself to speak to them more than I do

[davbrucas]

Don,
You're at a weak point in your life...so dont go do something stupid like ask someone to marry you.

To answer your question, I am fine with who I am and have no regrets. And as far as your mom, I see her every day in the ER. It's a shame that this country spends billions protecting us from ourselves but they still allow cigarettes to be legal when 1.5 out of every 5 deaths in this country is attributed to smoking. That's a sobering number.