Sick to my stomach........wife left me today.

[Jester]

The board is not letting me reply unless I quote somebody. Been kinda quirky for me lately.

Well, the wife and I are talking atleast. SHe thinks I am going to be the old guy that was a dick, but in all honesty, I have no idea how to even be that guy anymore. All I know is that if she leaves me for good, all the hard work she put into me thru all the years is gonna go to some other lucky girl. lol

[BLAKE]

Sorry to hear it homie. Some good thoughts in this thread so far.

My best advice is for you to try to keep a good attitude, because this story hasn't been written yet, and you don't know where it's gonna go. Learn from your mistakes (sounds like you've got that on lock-down) and no matter the outcome, use the experience to make you stronger.

And listen to Denny. Underneath that tinfoil hat he's wearing is a good heart with some great advice.

[War Machine]

Remember, life is wonderful, without it, you're dead

[joes01bullitt]

sorry to hear about this....

best of luck to both of you guys....

[Jyard]

Just keep your head up. It'll only get better over time.

[War Machine]

think of this, my ol lady looks like a wild bore, snores like a dump truck, has a hairy back, farts all the time, and everytime I try to break up with her she starts hitting herself in the face and calls the cops.

[Leah]

I would say give it more time but two weeks seems decent.

I would go back home, don't bring it up, don't be overly nice, don't be a douche, just be normal, do your thing and see what happens. Act like it never happen.

Sorry, bro. Worst advice EVER. Do not pretend nothing happened. No matter if there are, she is perceiving that there are problems. You ignoring that she feels that way will only make things worse.

Offer to talk and LISTEN to what she has to say. Don't try and fix it or comment after each thing she says. Just listen. Then when she pauses or asks for feedback, restate what she said-'after listening to you, what I'm hearing is...am I right?' Then if she agrees talk to her about it. Offer to change or give your understanding of how things were playing out and work it out like two caring adults.

The biggest thing is that she wants to have her feelings validated. So make sure you don't place blame or use 'you' statements (like 'well, I don't like it when you....). Use generic statements or own it yourself (I really like it when we ____ and when _____ happens, I don't feel like we get as much out of it), that way she doesn't feel you are blaming her for anything, but you still mention the problem.

Also make sure she knows you are willing to work on it. Make a contract about the things she's worried about. Yada, yada, yada...

Best of luck.

[CJ-95GT]

Sorry to hear bro. Keep fighting for her if she's that important to you. Don't quit if you know she's the one you want to grow old with.

[01vnms4v]

Sorry to hear that Levi. Its a tragedy of human nature when those of us who are capable of changing ourselves for the better, not only for ourselves but for those who matter most, get pushed to the side by those in-capable of change or seeing change in others.

I'm not trying to put myself in your shoes, simply to relate. I've never been married and I don't have any kids. But I've been with a woman or two who I thought was worth keeping for the long run. Both of those relationships had some early trials and tribulations, a lot on my part. I made the changes and sacrifices in my life to show them that I can and would be the person that they wanted, the person they needed. They were never capable of seeing that change. Women have a switch, they can hit it at ANY point in time. They can turn off love and emotion with that switch, and once its off, its not coming back on!

With all of that said, all you can do is give it everything its got. When you decide to go that route, you've got to realize when its not working and walk away. Otherwise your depression will only get worse. I am now in a relationship with an amazing woman. Someone I don't have to take care of. Someone who takes care of me. Someone who shares my same passion for life, finishes my sentences, and makes the same jokes as me. Life has never been better.

Very well said...Sir!

[jluv]

Sorry, bro. Worst advice EVER. Do not pretend nothing happened. No matter if there are, she is perceiving that there are problems. You ignoring that she feels that way will only make things worse.

Offer to talk and LISTEN to what she has to say. Don't try and fix it or comment after each thing she says. Just listen. Then when she pauses or asks for feedback, restate what she said-'after listening to you, what I'm hearing is...am I right?' Then if she agrees talk to her about it. Offer to change or give your understanding of how things were playing out and work it out like two caring adults.

The biggest thing is that she wants to have her feelings validated. So make sure you don't place blame or use 'you' statements (like 'well, I don't like it when you....). Use generic statements or own it yourself (I really like it when we ____ and when _____ happens, I don't feel like we get as much out of it), that way she doesn't feel you are blaming her for anything, but you still mention the problem.

Also make sure she knows you are willing to work on it. Make a contract about the things she's worried about. Yada, yada, yada...

Best of luck.

What good is making it work if they're both going to be women?

[Leah]

What good is making it work if they're both going to be women?

LMFAO! It's only to get her interested in talking to him.

[01yz2nv]

Im sorry to hear what you are going through. Though we have never met, I dont wish anything like this on anybody. Its tough for sure, just dont do anything to cause harm to yourself. Hope all works out, and from the sounds of it there is plenty of folks here willing to lend a helping hand.

[LS1Goat]

That sucks. Good luck.

[Stephen]

Levi please dont take this the wrong way... I dont read all of your threads but i kinda remember the last break up thread and yall found a way to work it out. then over the last several months i remember you being in houston, now your in tennesee. I'm no saint trust me and i definitely am not a master of pimping the bitches and hoes but i do gather that a woman wants her spouse around.. you have a small child and a infant.. No matter what you gotta be home with her helping or at least being there to help take the load off and listen to the "nag" that everything with a vag does lol. They arent like men where you can leave them alone with a 6pack of beer and a tv and they are content.. Im not 100% where im going with this but get home asap, try to make ammends, find the spark that got yall together in the 1st place, and dont look back. sorry about the huge ramble but i dont know what i would do if my wife/kid left me... I can only imagine how you feel at the moment.

[YALE]

Damn, Levi. If you need anything, let me know man.